Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Asians Taking Pictures of Other Asians Round 3

This morning a little bird got caught in the second floor hallway as the students came inside the school dragging their bags and weary chins. I walked back and forth opening windows, but the little starling wouldn’t cooperate. This way and that. To and fro. I gave a low whistle as the tiny creature landed on my teapot by the window sill. It’s this little whistle I always do, have always done, when I am alone. Still it wouldn’t leap. Just watched me with its eye. Nobody trusts anybody, do they?
I’ve been carrying this little paper acorn in my pocket the last couple of days, a colored origami present from Rebekah’s arts and crafts. Paper always reminds me of internal organs, how we are all just folded up and creased thin sheets of fragility. The acorn has an itsy-bitsy hole in the bottom you can blow into, makes it all puffy. When my almost five year old gave it to me she had been hiding it behind her back, telling me to close my eyes and hold out my hands, laughing the way little girls do all of their lives until they are old women and know all the secrets of the world.
Nina said it best, “People in Asia are just surviving.” I know so many people that are barely hanging on, just skin of their teeth clutching at straws. I used to check this website where people post their secrets, one person confessed they still write to Santa Claus even though they are middle aged, another person wrote that they leave notes tucked in airplane magazines for someone to find, something that would wake the finder up from the drudgery and soma-coma state they were living in. I don’t check that site anymore. I don’t want to know people’s real problems. I’d rather make up my own delusions about them and live in peace. How about you?

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